Public Touch Behavior in Romantic Relationships between Men and Women
By: Laura K. Guerrero
Peter A. Anderson
In the first section of this article is labeled “Relational Stage Differences in Touch.” This section asks the question whether forms of touch are more prevalent in earlier relationships or more intimate relationships. According to research and theory on courtships and flirting, it suggests that touch will be used more often in earlier relationships. I believe this is true because once you are just beginning a relationship, you want to make sure that the person is “yours” and that they are not going to leave you. If you just start out a relationship, you believe that there is always a greater chance of the person leaving you, so you want to try and do anything that will keep them from leaving. Once a relationship is farther down the road, you know that your significant other is “yours” and you don’t need to impress them to make them stay. In the beginning relationships, researchers have found that couples don’t match as much as those in more advanced relationships. Capella and Palmer found a similar pattern for nonverbal. I believe this is true because as a relationship goes on, you get to know the person even better. I believe that if you try hard enough, you can learn something new about a person every day. By the time you’re married, you know a person pretty well, and you can almost tell what they are going to do before they even do it. In studies, behavioral matching was highest for married couples who were very committed to one another and who had a relational history. I believe that this means they did not rush into marriage. They dated for a long while because they got married.
Research shows that men initiate more touch. Researchers think this is because it is a more dominance move. On the other hand, some researchers have failed to find any difference between sexes and who initiates touching, or they found that females initiate touch more. Since these findings are not as consistent as some would like it, they decided that how far along in the relationship is what determines who initiates touch first.
I personally think that it does not matter who initiates touch first. It may have mattered in earlier years, but now that we’re in the 21st century, there are no specific rules. In today’s society, I think the initiator is whoever is more outgoing. In a relationship, I would most likely wait for the man to make the first move. It is not that I think it is a “rule”, but it is because I am shy when it comes to that. I get too nervous that the guy will not show interest or reciprocate the action. Some couples don’t like to show public displays of affections, so they simply don’t hold hands, hug, or kiss in public. I believe that people read too much into this, especially when it comes to celebrities. If couples don’t hold hands in public, people will think that they broke up or are in a fight. Sometimes they don’t hold hands simply because they don’t want to.
Research shows that men initiate more touch. Researchers think this is because it is a more dominance move. On the other hand, some researchers have failed to find any difference between sexes and who initiates touching, or they found that females initiate touch more. Since these findings are not as consistent as some would like it, they decided that how far along in the relationship is what determines who initiates touch first.
I personally think that it does not matter who initiates touch first. It may have mattered in earlier years, but now that we’re in the 21st century, there are no specific rules. In today’s society, I think the initiator is whoever is more outgoing. In a relationship, I would most likely wait for the man to make the first move. It is not that I think it is a “rule”, but it is because I am shy when it comes to that. I get too nervous that the guy will not show interest or reciprocate the action. Some couples don’t like to show public displays of affections, so they simply don’t hold hands, hug, or kiss in public. I believe that people read too much into this, especially when it comes to celebrities. If couples don’t hold hands in public, people will think that they broke up or are in a fight. Sometimes they don’t hold hands simply because they don’t want to.